So What Do I REALLY Want And What Do I KNOW Now that I Didn't Know Before?

Here I am on day three of Blogging Along With Effy and already a day behind but such is my life these days!  Sharing is always a little bit scary for me but sharing how I really feel and what I really think is even scarier.  I have been sitting here, staring at this blank blog page and picturing all kinds of crazy scenarios that could develop if I shared my REAL feelings and my true hidden self, and I came very close to not blogging this at all, because if I am going to do this Blogging thing I have to do it for real and commit to sharing my truth in my answers ... so in the words of Dr. Wayne Dyer: "Feel the Fear and Do It Anyway!"

Day #2 Prompt: "What Do I REALLY want?"

This is question I have been asking myself for a while now and I am absolutely terrified to answer it and I don't know why I am so afraid?

Is it because answering it means I am putting out there something I really want and might not get? 

Or am I afraid of committing to one plan or one direction?

Or do I think that I cannot ask for more?

Or am I afraid that I may actually GET what I ask for and then Don't Want It?! 

BINGO! Yup, that's the one! Oh Ms. Effy Wild your seemingly innocent little blog prompt has revealed something I have been hiding from myself and I now have to deal with -  Poopie! Poopie! Crap! CRAP!! (grin)

 So I have decided to wait to answer this particular question until I have done some heart and soul work.

 

... Now on to Day #3 Prompt:

"Write about something you used to believe that you no longer believe and how that shift in belief has changed things for you."

 

When I was 49 years old these words came into my life:  "YOU Are A Beautiful Soul".  It was 2011 and I was taking the very first on-line Brave Girls class called Soul Restoration and the third lesson was about making myself a Truth Card.  Of the pages and pages of quotes and sayings provided to me those five words just jumped off the page and hit me in the heart!

The crazy thing is I did not realize until that moment how UGLY I felt in my heart and in my soul.

 

As I was making this little Truth Card for myself those five words played over and over in my head; I placed the completed card in my bathroom so I saw it every morning, and throughout the day, whenever I felt sad or low or insignificant or unworthy, I would chant to myself  "You Are A BEAUTIFUL Soul" until one day as, I was again chanting my mantra, I realized that I really BELIEVED that I WAS a Beautiful Soul!  That was the day I started smiling every time I thought of those words.

 

Six years later, whenever I am feeling insecure or unworthy or sad I still chant those five words and they still make me Smile and it puts everything back into perspective.  Today, when I see myself in a mirror or as a reflection in someone else's eyes, I try to see only my beautiful soul.

Thanks for sharing with me today gentle souls.

Nameste

Lynne